N4 · Wanting and intending
Wanting somebody to do it: てほしい
てほしい and ないでほしい
The te-form plus ほしい says that you want somebody else to do something — or, with ないで, not to.
At a glance
- Remember
- Want somebody to do it: person に, te-form, ほしい — and not to: ないでほしい.
- Form
- 手伝ってほしいwant you to help
- Signal words
- 〜てほしい
- 〜ないでほしい
- 〜てほしかった
- 〜てもらいたい
- 〜ていただきたい
- Trap
- Wrong:弟を勉強してほしいです。Right:弟に勉強してほしいです。
Your turn
9 exercises on this topic. Your answers are checked in the browser; none of them leaves your device.
The form
How the forms are built
Each row gives the meaning first, then the form in Japanese. The colours show what changes from one form to the next.
stem (regular) stem (irregular) ending auxiliary verb
| want you to help | 手伝ってほしい |
| want you to come | 来てほしい |
| want you to do it | してほしい |
| don't want you to go | 行かないでほしい |
| wanted you to tell me | 言ってほしかった |
| would like you to wait (softer) | 待ってもらいたい |
The rules one by one
The form this topic is about
The te-form plus ほしい says that you want somebody to do it; that person takes に.
母に早く元気になってほしいです。I want my mother to get better soon.
ないでほしい says that you want somebody not to do it.
ここでたばこを吸わないでほしいです。I would rather people didn't smoke here.
てほしかった looks back at something you wished had happened.
来られないなら、先に言ってほしかった。If you could not come, I wish you had told me first.
てもらいたい and ていただきたい are softer and politer forms of the same wish.
この書類を確認していただきたいのですが。I would like you to check this document, if you would.
Example sentences
友達にもっと連絡してほしいです。I wish my friends would get in touch more often.
明日の会議には必ず来てほしいです。I want you to come to tomorrow's meeting without fail.
このことはだれにも言わないでほしい。I don't want you to tell anyone about this.
夫にもう少し早く帰ってきてほしいです。I wish my husband would come home a little earlier.
子どもたちには自由に育ってほしいと思っています。I want my children to grow up free.
危ないから、一人で行かないでほしい。It's dangerous, so I'd rather you didn't go alone.
7 more example sentences
先生にもっとゆっくり話してほしいです。I wish the teacher would speak more slowly.
誰かにこの荷物を運んでほしい。I want somebody to carry this luggage.
遅れるなら、電話してほしかった。If you were going to be late, you should have phoned.
夜は大きい音で音楽を聞かないでほしいです。I would rather you didn't play loud music at night.
部長には一度資料を見ていただきたいと思っています。I would like the department head to look at the material once.
この町にもっと本屋が増えてほしい。I wish there were more bookshops in this town.
彼にはずっとこの会社にいてほしい。I want him to stay with this company for good.
The trap English speakers fall into
Watch out
English "I want my brother to study" makes the brother the object of "want", and the object particle follows. In Japanese the thing wanted is the studying; the brother is the person the wish is aimed at, and that is に, as with てもらう.
The full explanation
Read it all · about 1 min
When you want somebody else to do something, put the verb in the te-form and add ほしい: 手伝ってほしい, "I want you to help". The person is marked with に: 弟にもっと勉強してほしい, "I want my brother to study more". After a te-form, ほしい is normally written in kana.
The negative wish is ないでほしい: 行かないでほしい, "I don't want you to go". It is built on the negative te-form, the same one as in ないでください. The past, てほしかった, is a quiet complaint: "I would have liked you to" — and you did not.
English "I want you to" puts the other person as the object of "want". Japanese cannot: ほしい takes the thing wanted with が, and here that "thing" is the action. The person who is to act is the target, so に. Learners who reach for を — 弟を勉強してほしい — are translating the English word order.
Like ほしい itself, てほしい reports the speaker's feelings, and said straight to somebody it tells them about those feelings rather than asking them. It can sound like pressure. An ordinary request is made with てください or てくれませんか; a softer wish with てもらいたい, and a polite one with ていただきたい.
A closer look
Politer ways to want something from somebody
てほしい is plain and direct. A softer, slightly more polite version is てもらいたい, and towards a superior or a customer the form is ていただきたい: 確認していただきたいのですが, "I would like you to check this, if you would".
All three still describe your wish. To ask, Japanese turns them into a question about the other person's willingness: 手伝ってもらえませんか, 手伝っていただけませんか. The wish forms are what you say when explaining a situation; the question forms are what you say when you need the help now.
Worth knowing (2)
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Asking softly with んですが
Adding んですが after てほしい leaves the sentence open, so it sounds like a wish laid before the listener rather than an order.
窓を閉めてほしいんですが。I'd like you to shut the window, if you don't mind.
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Wishing for the weather
てほしい does not need a person to ask. It also wishes for things nobody controls: the rain, a train, the end of a long day.
早く雨がやんでほしいです。I wish the rain would stop.
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